The Daily Whine

Just read in the Jakarta Post today that the Indonesian government has approved the establishment of a giant coffee plantation in North Sumatra, jointly developed by a Japanese and US company. Speculation suggests Starbucks might be involved.

Good. I like Starbucks’ Sumatran blend. Earthy, slightly spicy, and acidic. Smells like the tropics. At least I’m confident the coffee won’t taste like rancid crap from Jamaica (that’s where Blue Mountain is from, right?).

The thing that grabbed me was the size of the farm — 3,000 hectares. I’m pretty bad with sizing things up, so I did the math in my head. A hectare is 10,000 square meters (100m by 100m). So I’m looking at 30 million sq meters, or, if the layout of the plantation was a flat square, it’d be nearly 5.5km on each side. (And if the plantation was 100m wide the whole way, it’d be 300km long). For a sense of scale that I can appreciate, I run 5km on the treadmill and feel weaker than Jamaican coffee (hey, I’m old and rubbery now, okay? Back off!).

So we’re looking at a pretty large farm there. And the opening up of 3,000 hectares of farmland means the removal of 3,000 hectares of forest. That sounds like a drop in the ocean for one of the world’s largest countries, but Indonesia is chopping down trees faster than it’s processing the paperwork for them, so it’s a situation that will have plenty of environmentalists camping out in front of the Forestry Ministry over the next few days. Deforestation is happening everywhere in Indonesia right now, and that’s part of the reason why local governments across the country are enraged, albeit for a more commercial reason. Jakarta is selling off timberland (and other natural resources) to US, Japanese and Chinese businessmen and the money is going straight to her coffers, not those of the administrating local government. It’s a major grievance for separatists in Papua, Aceh, parts of Sulawesi and the Moluccas.

The justification for building a 3,000-hectare coffee plantation is that such a major investment will represent a significant boost to the local economy, with at least 12,000 people standing gain employment, and exports to fund further infrastructural development there.

Or at least that’s the idea. Like so many other investments here, the real beneficiaries predictably are administrating officials with large pockets to fill. It’s a harsh reality of Indonesian life – national interests are matters of little interest to those whose day job is to be protecting them. The president said cleaning up the government was the first order of the day when he took up office two years ago. Even if he means to do so, he won’t be able to. Not when all the officials that keep him in office have something – have much! – to lose by keeping their hands in their pockets.

The greenies have justified cause for grievance, by the way. Economic development and progress in Indonesia is characterized by unsightly industrial creep and urban sprawl, and a distinct lack of zoning. When whole squatter villages can pop up in the middle of major thoroughfares and develop into full-sized communities in a matter of weeks, it becomes likely that a small piece of jungle, once cleared and converted into commercial use, is inevitably only the first destructive ripple in an ever widening circle. Check back in with the Dairi regency (where the coffee plantation will be) in a couple of years time and you may not find a single tree standing where once was jungle.

A couple of days ago I took the opportunity to try a cup of the much-heralded  Blue Mountain coffee at the end of lunch.

Not impressed.

Since I’m not a coffee connaisseur, I can’t tell if it tasted full-bodied or acidic, fruity or sharp. To me, it tasted like coffee. In fact, it tasted less interesting than coffee.

It was the first time I’d bothered to try Blue Mountain, a blend much romanticised and priced at a premium. Actually, I was looking quite forward to tasting it. Before Starbucks turned coffee-drinking into a yuppy art, Blue Mountain was supposed to have been at the pinnacle of the coffee experience (if my mom and aunts were to be believed); but since it’s always been pricey, I’ve never asked for a cup. So, for whatever reason, I got excited about the idea of having one at the end of lunch.

I didn’t get the big deal. Even cheap 60-cent coffee from the kopitiam tastes better. Heck, even 3-in-1 coffee from our office pantry tastes better. I couldn’t for the life of me understand how a coffee with such an intriguing name fuck up  so spectacularly.

Quite clearly, my palate is plebian. It’s the same thing with wines. You’ve got bottles that cost more than May’s entire wardrobe, but I’ve always shopped from the $20 bin. (My philosophy is that there is never a good enough reason to eat or drink anything which costs more than my wardrobe). I just don’t get the whole vintage and sophisticated scents thing.

Maybe I just don’t want to. My work revolves around convincing people that they should pay a premium to pick certain brands, so maybe on a subconscious level I’m just trying to compensate for all the bullshit I spew day-to-day. Don’t know, don’t care. All I know is, Blue Mountain coffee sucks big time, and you couldn’t induce me to throw another $10 at it ever.